Oh I don’t know when United will ever give up fighting with me. When it comes to battling them I have the patience of a Chinese general. I’ll wait you out and eventually, you’ll get tired and give in. That’s my strategy. Sure, put me on hold. I have a Bluetooth and I can go about my business while I listen to the lovely United hold music. I’m writing this blog right now while I wait. If they really wanted to annoy me, they should play some Kenny G or something that agitates you enough to hang up and they can claim victory. Not me. I’m holding away. And those fuckers didn’t figure out what I wanted… so we’ll try again tomorrow.
So this blog has been brewing but I haven’t really have found the time or motivation to write it. So I have been building up some items in my head to write. So here we go…
Checking in on Facebook
It’s so cute and adorable that you feel everyone should know where you are every living second of your day. First, I don’t care. If you’re not hanging with me then I don’t want to be bothered by what you’re doing because it’s either one, better than what I’m doing at the moment because I’m on facebook reading it or two, putting me to sleep that you checked in at the local grocery store. Also keep into consideration that weirdo stalker that you added and forgot. Check into a bar on Saturday night? Guess who is going “accidentally” run into you? You got it. Creepy stalker guy/girl.
Finally, I don’t know if people realize it or not, but by advertising you’re not home is great way to get your house robbed. Again, I refer back to creepy stalker guy/girl who breaks into your house to steal your underwear for their shrine. And while they are there, they jack your TV. Not cool at all my friends.
Wedding Planning
Our list has gone a little nutso. But what’s funny is that it’s not us that are driving us nuts… it’s everyone else. I would like to say that as much as I appreciate all the help, we have to remind people that this is not their wedding. We are trucking right along the way we want it, but everyone wants their two cents. It’s tough to smile without cracking. Oh but that’s why alcohol was created. We love you… but back off at bit.
Last weekend was the start of the renovations to the backyard. It was a hoot. My first encounter with a tiller was fun. It kicked my ass. By the time we were done (two dump runs later) our yard is now a mud pit. I know it’s going to be great in the end. It’s just hard for me to be in the in between stage. I’m just a few steps away from popping “The Money Pit” into the DVD player to talk me off the ledge. That movie always reminds me that it is always not as bad as it could be. Plus I found a way to use my Native American roots to score a grant to help pay for the renovations. YES!
Working Out
Conner has me feeling guilty for eating sweets. Competing with a 16-year old to stay in shape is not the best idea. But in a way it is. Case in point, Jen bought me a Reese’s heart for V-day that she just found in her closet I suppose. I was going to eat it, but then I realized I would have to answer to him… and it’s not really worth it. I guess the best part of it is that he keeps me honest with it. I had to claim my milkshake last week but damn it was worth it. Do I really need to get in better shape? Not really, I’m a freaking stud. However, you can always get better and it’s nice to have to some push you.
The Logic of United
Speaking of pushing, United kept me on hold for 57 minutes and didn’t change Jen’s flight. Now, I wasn’t asking to actually change her flight, but instead cancel the outbound portion of it. Jen has to be down in LA earlier because of the conference for her new job. So I would figure that canceling it would be easy because I wasn’t asking for a refund (I used a voucher anyway). But after talking to two foreign people on the phones it was no dice. First they tried to charge me $200 to change a flight that cost $200 total. Fuck you. They backed the $150 change fee off and wanted me to pay the difference in the new flight. Mind you I’m not changing a flight… just making a round trip a one way. I’m actually SAVING them money by not having Jen on the flight so some other fat fucker can sit next to me on that tiny plane paying twice what I did. No dice. Fine, you might have won the battle, but you certainly did not win the war. Like I said before… I have the patience of Chinese general. They knew they get Hong Kong back one day from the British and I will get win this war. And when I do win, I’m going to call back supervisor SU4 and tell him to lick my nuts. Don’t fuck with a champion.
