Insanity is a dish best served microwaved

Today was all about making up for the sins of the past week.  I took me a week to make a LIST, not  to complete it mind you, just to make it of things that I had to do around the house.  In addition, I had a bunch of work that I still needed to finish for last year and to get this year started.  Here I thought I was going to be on vacation and I remember all this other crap that I have to get accomplished.  So at 11:30 at night I’m making Twitter accounts for all my schools.  Linda thinks that I am going to make one for myself, she’s sorely mistaken.   I pledge my undying (well until something comes along better) to my stalking site–facebook.  But I finally figured out a way to use it for my business.  So I guess that’s a start.  In addition,  I didn’t work out last night and I did a double workout today to make up it.  Then I made the smart idea of taking my car in at 7a to have the fuse replaced which I think I can figure out on my own.

On a happier note, my grass is back to being green.  So I guess I finally have done something right on the homefront.  So tomorrow while I’m up at the buttcrack of summer dawn, I can get a bunch of stuff done… why… cause this guy is going to Cabo on Thursday!

I love Chico.  It’s a great city that offers recreation aplenty and is a true community.  However, everytime I go down to THE city (San Francisco for you non-Northern Californians), I always want to try to move down there to experience urban living.  There’s so much about it that attracts me to it.  The locality of everything from groceries to entertainment.  The lack of Wal-Mart (which I loathe more and more everyday) and identity to your neighborhood is something that appeals to me.  I could also do without a car for the most part too.  The only way I see myself doing the city life with the level of comfort I would like is to stay with Herff and move up in management.  The downside is that I would be on the road a lot more which I guess  is fine for a while.  But eventually,  I will grow tired of it and want to come back to Chico again.  And I have to face the reality that the dating pool in Chico is pretty shallow.  So unless I want to be in a walker when my kids graduate from high school, I need to expand that pool.

But for the moment, I had a great moment this weekend.  I went down to the city for my buddy Steve’s birthday party.  My other buddy Blake and I drove down on Saturday morning made a few pit stops and made it into the city by early afternoon.  We checked out Steve’s new place then headed over to another one of his friend’s apartment.  We went up on the roof, had some drinks, and watched them play a game called donkey nuts.  It looked like a lot of fun, but I was very much content laying in the chair enjoying the view of the Golden Gate Bridge, Coit Tower, and Alcatraz all in view. The sun was shining bright and I was with good people.  We grabbed some food and headed back to get ready for the party.  It was a “wigging” out party and everyone had to wear a wig.  Sadly, my first wig went MIA and I borrowed another wig.  Apparently, I looked like Andy Dick’s character from Old School that taught how to give bjs.   Great….

The party was pretty cool.  Kayla, Steve’s girlfriend planned it all for him.  We had a pre-party at his house complete with jello shots (yum) and cake (more yum).  We then got aboard a party trolley that took us to a few bars around town.  I was happily gobbling down jello shots on the back of the bus and by the time we got to the first bar, I was already feeling them.  I bounced around and talked to a few ladies and friends.  We got back on the trolley and headed to the next bar.  When we got to the next bar, I was talking to this guy and he was telling me that he was working on a comedy porn.  My drunken self pointed out to him that porn can’t be funny–at least not on purpose.  It either has to be funny which would make it a naked comedy or a porn… no gray area.  He really didn’t like my answer… so I sought the counsel of other guys in the room who for the most part agreed with me.  Meanwhile outside of the bar, Steve was arguing with the bouncer who wouldn’t let his girlfriend in.  So in the short 10 minutes or so, we were back on the trolley.  It took us forever to get out there and now were leaving.  Oh well… I didn’t need another drink, so I was fine.

We went to the last bar and this was one that I have been to before.  The guy was still a jerk that was the bartender.  Blake, I found out, paid $22 for a drink for Ryan’s girlfriend which is insane.  But I had one thing on my mind by then… pizza.  I stood in line, got pulled out of line by my friend, and got put back into line again for pizza.  I could taste the greasy goodness coming my way.. then… buzz.  Shit.  Blake is calling me to tell me they are leaving me if I don’t get out of line.  Faced with paying for a taxi ride on my own or delicious greasy pizza, I decided it would be best to go with the crowd.  I still got pizza–but it wasn’t as good near our hotel.

I finally passed out around 3 this morning sharing a bed with Blake and the great pillow wall.   I was about to fall off the double bed all together when I hear the dreaded sound of my alarm on my phone.  But it’s not my phone–it’s Ryan’s.  I get up and turn his off… but he’s a smart cookie and has a second set for himself during the week which goes off an hour later.   Then his girlfriend’s phone goes off at 6.  I was so pissed because everytime I would fall asleep, someone’s phone woke me up.  The topper was the housekeeper knocking at the door at 9a.  Seriously.  At a hotel on a SUNDAY, who knocks at 9a. Check out time isn’t until 11… let me the fuck alone.  I was ready to pounce when she knocked and I scared the shit out of my friends who thought I was getting a little too worked up.  It was the lack of sleep that did it in for me.

We got up and started to move. We had to get cars, help clean up, and try to make the Giants game at 1:05.  We managed to get most of it done, have a nice lunch, and make the game.  We were WAY up in the nose bleed section.  Also everytime I go to ATT Park, I get sunburned… today was not an exception.  However, today was too nice to not be out in the sun.  We had a nice breeze and just watched a pretty good game.  I could just see the players, but not who they were.  Zito pitched well and I headed out at the end of the 8th to beat the traffic.  I drove Ryan to the BART station and rocked out home.    My ipod died on the way home so I just made due with the radio… which really does suck.

But overall it was a great weekend.  I’m an easy target for my friends.  Today was pick on Robby day.  It’s okay because I dish it out just as much as I get it.  But today I was getting my weekly serving.    I just say stuff that if I wasn’t me, I would make fun of it.  Sometimes the filter doesn’t kick in quite fast enough.  Oh well, at least we can always laugh about it.

It was a hot day today.  So hot in fact that I learned that my house doesn’t really cool down in the evening.  It’s almost 11p at night and I’m relaxing comfortably in my hammock outside looking up at the stars and again enjoying another great moment in my life.  I can hear the slow bustle of traffic out in front of my house.  It’s summer indeed.  The heat has come and will start to lay out that oppression that I’ve come to love.

My summer mode is pretty relaxing.  I stay up later into the night because it’s only 80 degrees or so instead of 110.  I sleep later into the day and just try to not sweat to death.   My beloved Otter Pops also become a handy ally during these months.  Nothing cools me off like two (you always have to eat Otter pops in twos) tasty otter pops.  I also now live less than a half mile from our grand One Mile Swimming Hole that is good to definaely be a plus this summer too.

I just realized last night that I leave for Cabo on  Thursday.  I have done absolutely nothing to prepare for this trip yet.  There is not a lot to really plan.  I just need a bathing suit, sunscreen, and a bunch of great books to read.   I’m technically there for a 20-30 conference… but I’m not going to really do anything and everyone is there to party.   So, I’m not going to stress.  I love staying at RIU resorts because they are all inclusive and they have soft serve most of the day.  I just want to relax and zone out away from my computer and phone for a few days.

Now, I’m just going to listen to some Dave and look up at star show tonight.

Helicopter parents need to park it.  I’m seriously terrified where our society is going.  Case in point… I was at my friend’s daughter birthday party.  I am watching these parents chase their children around mercilessly.  First off, they are in a fenced yard of a couple that has a ONE year old.  The yard is going to be safe.  Let them be.  My other friend was watching two young kids for another one of her friends.  No fault of hers, but it’s the conditioning of what’s going on around us.    The kids were in the bounce house and the youngest who is a little over one fell while bouncing.  My friend gasps and wants to rush to her… my reaction… she’ll be fine.   Then I look like I don’t care about the kid.  But it’s far for the case.  I want them to experience the world around them.  In interacting the world, they are going to get scrapes and bruises.  But hopefully children know that the ones that love them will be right there to help apply the bandaid afterwards.  Where would we be if the world protected us all the time?  We’d be in bubble wrap encased in plastic balls like hamsters.  That’s no way to be a kid.  Being a kid is about eating mud and/or boogers and getting stung every once in a while.  Not putting kids on low sugar diets or all these food allergies… helicopter parents.. you’re causing this shit… stop it.

Another thing helicopter parents… your kid doesn’t have to feel good about him or herself all the time.  They are going to be a loser now and again.  Losing teaches people humility and sportsmanship.  Giving everyone a ribbon for showing up does nothing but create a false sense of entitlement.  Stop it.  Again, another example from the party… my friend, God bless her, bought an adorable pinata for her 1 year old daughter.  On the bottom of the pinata were these little strings.  When it was explained to me by another parent that the strings were used so that EVERYONE could break the pinata, I lost it.  I was so disgusted not at my friend, but someone who though this was necessary to make, and took a picture of it.  I knew exactly where it was going to go–on this blog.  Granted, my friend’s daughter is one.  But still… let the kids take a whack at the damn thing and she could tap it or something.  Then the older kids could whack the crap out of it until it rained candy.  That’s the way it should be.  Everyone still gets something and one kid goes home with a little more confidence because he or she broke it.

If we are going to really nurture children to be creative, dynamic individuals we have to stop with the bubble wrap.  Yes, you need to have a net to catch your children.  Helicopter parents you don’t have to suffocate your children with your net.  They need room just like you needed room when you were a child.  Stop writing their college entry essays, calling their professors, putting gps on anything they own, and protecting them from everything.  I’m not saying that you shouldn’t be careful what your child is doing… but in the great words of George Carlin… “take a fucking chance every now and again.”  Because we are not too far away from installing gps chips into children when they are born.

Everytime I write about this, I get grief.   But you know what?  It bugs me, so I’m going to write about it.

Out of shape people.

Notice I didn’t call them FAT people.  No, that would be mean.  They aren’t FAT people–they are just out of shape people and yet again, they are fucking up my universe.

I work out a pretty swanky club in Chico.  The reason why I chose this club as I have mentioned in earlier blogs is because it was across the street from my old apartment.  By the time I bought my house, it was an easy bike ride.   So I stayed.  I enjoy it because it’s the best in town and it mostly made of people that maintain their health pretty well.

And then we have our “special” groups…

My club started this biggest loser competition this month apparently.  The club also just completed a new personal training section a few months ago.  Now this biggest loser competition isn’t free–it’s something these “out of shape” people paid extra to do with a personal trainer.  I’m all for finding ways to get in shape–just as long as it’s not grasing on my grass.  Yesterday, I was enjoying a relaxing workout in a part of the gym that is usually good for not being as crowded.  I don’t like being in near proximity to people… I have a bubble and you best be backing up out of it.  Well when I turned around, I was surrounded by a gaggle of “out of shape” people.

Here’s my beef… you are paying extra to use the new section of the gym.  Stay the fuck over there.  Don’t come out to the common areas which we all have to share and expect us to wait as you do a circuit training that keeps six or seven pieces of equipment tied up for a half an hour.  I already have to compete with old people that take forever and frat boys that just like to show off to other guys.  I don’t need the gaggle messing me up any more.

I don’t want to seem mean.. but I guess I am.  So, I wish them the best of luck… just from a distance in their own room.

I was reading an article in Time a last week about a Saturday morning cartoon creator team from the 70s.  It outlined their shows and it got me thinking… what the hell happened to good quality Saturday morning cartoons?

I remember when I was a kid getting up at like 7:30 (that’s where the crappy cartoons were placed) and watching cartoons in the morning until 10:30ish eating cold pizza.  Why I say 10:30ish is because they had an hour of Looney Tunes and I would be bored watching them after about a half hour and go do something else.

Now, I can’t remember which shows were actually Saturday morning shows or after school shows.  But what I do remember they were quality.    Snoorkles, Thundercats, Transformers, Voltron,  He-Man, Shirt-Tales, and the Adventures of the Gummy Bears to name a few.  I do remember that Inspector Gadget and Duck Tales were after school–but they were the bomb.

Over the past 10 years, the movie industry has made a mockery of my sacred 80’s cartoons.  The Inspector Gadget movie was embarrassing as was the Alvin and the Chipmunk movies.   The only one of somewhat decent quality was Transformers.  Now there’s word they are thinking about making even more of them.  The GI Joe movie isn’t close to the cartoon and the He-Man remake probably won’t be either.  I must also note that the 80s He-Man wasn’t the best movie, but I still liked it because they tried to stay true to the cartoon.

I just wish Boomerang would bring back Saturday morning cartoons again and I would get up (a little hungover probably) with a bowl of cereal and/or cold pizza if it’s available and watch some major blocks of cartoons and relive the good ol’ days.

Well this weekend pretty much ended the 2008-2009 school year for me.  With the exception of two schools next week, I’m ready to call it a year.  It’s been a good run, but I’m already looking forward to do it all over again next year.  I’ve learned so much that I can’t wait to put it back into theory in the fall… IN the fall.  For now, I’m looking forward to a little rest.

The last week makes all the phone calls, e-mails, and screaming parents worth it.  Thursday night started it all at River Valley.  Now, I don’t play favorites, but there are students at River Valley that have become good friends of mine.  Many of them I’ve known since they were sophomores.  It’s been great to watch them grow and finally reach this stage in their lives.  I enjoy the hour before graduation because it’s really their time.  They get to enjoy the last movements together and I can spend a little one on one time with the students I’ve joked with every time I’m there.  I can’t handle staying at the ceremony because I get all reflective and I can do that six or seven times a year.  So when the kids line up to walk, I pack my boxes and make my way to my car.  I know that this is the last time I might see some of these kids.

I did it again on Friday and Saturday at some of my other schools.  I was able to joke with the kids and help take the edge off the kids who are excited/nervous.  It’s a huge step and it was happening so fast for them.  I can just watch it over and over again.  So, next week, I’ll pack my boxes one last time for the Class of 2009.  For there, I”ll start it all over again for a new group.  I’m excited to meet new people, grow more as a professional, and make new friends.