Insanity is a dish best served microwaved

A lack of planning on your part, doesn’t constitute an emergency on my part. 

Today it just felt like that was dancing in my head.  I spent the day bopping along to groove of my day.  I had everything planned out and ready to go the CADA conference tomorrow.  I was going to clean my house, finish my paperwork, and pack all the things I needed for the rest of the week.   The sun was shining and life was swell. 

After lunch,  I felt like I just crammed eight hours of work into four.  First, I got a call from the Outlaws letting me know we won the privilege of making their championship ring.  Score for me.  But they wanted to meet today to design the ring.  I’m on it.  Damn, I can’t run with Susan.  I make the call, but get a little guilt for canceling.  I try to make it, but the meeting takes too long.  In between 1 and 3:30, I cram in the last of my work and my workout.  I was successful and had a great meeting with the Outlaws.

Then,  I ran over to Target without a list–mistake.  I think I was too focused on the slight hope they would have a wii hanging out… but no luck.  I forgot why I went there in the first place, art paper, and now I have to do it in the morning on the way to Reno.  Then Megan called me last minute asking for pictures and advise on a project that we’ve been working on for a month.  Which of course stresses me out because it’s not done. CRAP!  I forgot to make flyers… and I just remembered.  Well that’s one more trip in the morning. 

It’s going to be a great conference and I am excited to see some old friends.  It’s always weird to be on the other side of the fence being a vendor and not an attendee.   However, I get to be surrounded by a ton of energy.  I am also presenting…. and who knows, I might win a little money.

 Until Saturday….

My love life sucks.

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	7.3
Mind:	7.1
Body:	9.6
Spirit:	7.1
Friends/Family:	5.9
Love:	0.8
Finance:	9
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

I don’t know what happened to good, cheap fast food.  Cameron, my little brother, called and asked if we could go to dinner.  I asked him where he wanted to go and he mentioned Chico Burger.  I thought, what the heck, I’ve been in the mood for a burger for a while.  So, I picked Cameron up and headed over for a sin burger.  When we got there and ordered, I paid nine bucks for a combo meal.  WTF?  I believe if you paid over $5 for a combo meal of anything involving a hamburger, it become a gourmet burger.  Hence, it’s not longer a sin burger because all the grease has been sucked up by dollar bills.

I spent most of the day trying to catch up on all the paperwork I’ve fallen behind from last week.  I was successful up to a point.  Then, I put my work aside to do my afternoon workout routine.  After a trip to Paradise (literally, it’s a town), I came back to my office.  I was running a bit late and I turboed through my weights to meet my running partner at 4p at the park. 

So after I rush through and through some miracle I finish my weights in 20 minutes–cutting ten minutes off my normal time.  I fly back home and rush to the park only to find my running partner not there.  Of course.  Why would I expect her there?  So I wait… and wait… and wait.  Finally, she shows up.  Today, it wasn’t a huge deal because I didn’t really have much left to do this evening.  However, I think I lost 30 minutes of productive work time and the 20 minutes waiting.  So combined, I have to make up an hour of work tomorrow.   I don’t know why I do it, but most of my friends are so time-tarded.  Me?  I’m not late; I’m not early.  I’m on time.  I don’t expect others to be so freakish about being on time, but 5 minutes is respectable.

Tomorrow will be spent on getting ready for our CADA conference and all my paperwork that I missed today.  I will also make it a personal goal to not lose too much money gambling in Reno.  I really need to cut back the gambling to a respectable manner… but darn it, it’s sooo fun!

Well the storm that was supposed to blow us away didn’t do so much as it promised.  Which is a good thing, because I just had a gut feeling a tree was going to land on my car last night.  Instead, I had a wonderful game night with a few friends.  I was actually quite popular last night.  We played some taboo which is a great game if you are on it with your teammates.  After playing that game, some more friends showed up and we played the game of global domination–Risk.  Lucky me.  At about 2 A.M.,  I found that I had quite enough fun for one day and called it a night.  

But getting to the topic at hand, my alarm clock went nutty this week.  I know this might sound trivial to many, but I’ve had this alarm clock since I was in high school.   It has travelled to seven different houses with me. When I got home on Friday night, it was WAY ahead and I had no clue why.  I reset it and then it was doing it again.  Sadly, I had to dispose of it in a respectful manner…. I threw in the garbage can and walked away.  Okay, it wasn’t as big of an emotional attachment as I made it out to be.  But, a part of me was thrown away too.  No, not really.

My new roommate moved in on Friday too.  He’s a nice guy. But he’s trying too hard to win my affections… which is just going to annoy me in the end.  He moved here from Colorado–which I admire being pretty brave.  I just showed him around the town and he starts work tomorrow.  Hopefully he can acclimate himself here and branch out and meet new people.  It is just taking me a while to adjust to having someone in the house all the time.  With my old roommate, he was rarely here.  So, I am just getting used to have someone here. 

Rainy days are great for movies… I think I have a few to catch up today.

It was the song that was playing while I started this entry… so why not make it my title for tonight?

Today was a very exciting day for me.  I got to do my first round of graduation announcement delivery.  It sounds trite, but for me, it’s the signal that I didn’t totally screw up and things are going to be fine.  For the next three weeks, graduation announcements are rolling in to all my schools.  Each time, I have to organize and distribute to happy, yet frightened, seniors. 

I have forgotten, even though it’s only been ten years, what it’s like to be a senior in high school.  Life is going swell.  You are on the top of your world, then bam!  You are hit with the reality that life as you know it is going to change so rapidly in such a short period of time.  Most of these kids only have three months left to spend really being a kid.  Of course many will stay at home or move away for college, but the age of the innocence is over for them.  Like I mentioned last week, they are not only moving away from their parents, but they are putting away their inner child.  Some of the kids will never see each other again after graduation.  In many cases, they have been together since kindergarten.  There are always the promises to keep in touch, but you know as well as I, those are just empty promises.  Everyone moves on to new people, new experiences, new lives.   So many people laugh, including myself, when I say I sell graduation supplies.  But in reality those little shiny pieces of paper are really the symbol of the end for these kids.  Moving on is hard to do.  But thankfully, by delivering so early, they have some time to process it.

So in a way, I guess I am the luckiest.  I get to be there over and over again when these students confide in me that they are scared.   I just smile a little and say, it’s going to be alright.  Enjoy the time you have left and make the best of it.  Some of them it will probably pass right through their minds.  Who is this guy telling me this?  But maybe it will stick and they will take the advice to heart.

Then, come May and June when I deliver the caps and gowns is when tears and the oh crap moments hit.  I will watch nearly 1,100 kids graduate from four or five schools graduate this year.  All will walk across the stage in our gowns looking great of course.  Some of these students I will not have known more than the few minutes I had taking their order.  Others, I will have made a year-long friendship hanging out at a football game, rally, or in class.  I have given them ideas to make their school or lives better.   They have attended my leadership camp and bonded with their classmates over S’mores.  I am the luckiest. 

 This entry was no where I thought it was going. (:

Productive day today.  The weather reminded me that we are indeed still in winter.  Obama won Wisconsin.  I got work done.  I don’t know what it is about rain, but it motivates the crap out of me.  I think the smell of the rain and watching one of nature’s most beautiful gifts is an energizer.  I mean, have you ever really thought about rain?  It’s pretty darn cool if you ask me.  Water is FALLING from the sky.  We can not even begin to start how to make weather–only ways to pollute to screw it up.  Little water beads fall on our head and they are brought directly to us–we don’t have to ask for it to be delivered, it just shows up.  Nifty.

I have been off a day all day.  What caused my rhythm to be thrown off you ask?  My gym workout. That’s right.  I worked out early on Monday morning, which I rarely do, and I got home from Yuba City thinking it was Tuesday because I didn’t have to go the gym.  It’s scary how routine driven I really am.  One slight change, and I’m off my rocker.  I must take note of that.

20/30 meeting tonight was actually pretty active for once.  We have a ton of events coming down the pipe–including my brilliant ice skating rink downtown idea.  I’ve been working on it for a month and now I have to put the metal to the ground to get this baby to fly.  Because we want to do it on city property there is politics, permits, and pissed off people… the three Ps.  If anyone can work through a bureaucracy, it’s me.  When on a task, I have the focus of a laser. I will not stop  until the product is done.

The other little project that I have on my back burner is my class reunion.  Technically, this really isn’t my job… it’s our class president’s job.  However, I was class president for three years, then student body my senior year.  Still, everyone still looks at me to get things done.  I called our class president to try to get this done and of course she didn’t call me back.  There’s a few people that are interested in doing the reunion.  So screw it; yet again I am in charge and I’m going to job the way it should be done. 

I also checked in our Europe trip to see if we were ahead or behind on the airfare and tour price.  I have happy to report that we are still ahead on both the ticket and tour.  That makes me feel a little better because we are going to get killed when we go to buy Euros.  But no loss of conversion is going to rain on my Europe parade.  I’m stoked to go.

Lots of stuff on the stove… I think I’ll make a work stew.

Today was a most interesting day.  I woke up later than expected because I set my alarm clock for 7:15 P.M. not A.M.  Which is pretty scary because I’ve done it quite a few times.  You would think after the third time doing it, I would check the little dot to make sure it’s in the right place. 

I woke up and made my way outside to head to the gym.  I love mornings like today because the sun was already shinning and there was a bite in the air.  I walked over to the gym and did my weights.  I was kind of rushing through them because I was supposed to meet my running partner at 8 to run bearhole.  I just had a knack in my gut that she wasn’t going to show that early.  When I got back to my house at 7:58, she wasn’t there.  So, I called and got the voicemail.  I gave her 10 minutes to call me back and then I was off.  I was doing it for two reasons. One, I was in a hurry to get ready for the funeral.  Two, I’m tired of waiting for people all the time.  I’m not being inflexible.  I just have more respect for my time than other people do.

I went to Josh’s grandpa’s funeral and it was very nice.   People spoke many great things about Jimmie.  He has a great life and was well respected and admired by many.  Josh did a great job speaking about him and was able to keep it together.  It really is funny how much we are alike for just being half-cousins.  We are both threes with very big two wings.  He wants to take care of everyone, but he so desperately wants everything to go back to normal.  We threes are very resilient creatures. 

We then went over to his g-ma’s house and enjoyed a nice little reception.  I was playing wii with my cousin Zack and his cousin.  That is a pretty cool game system I’m thinking about getting.  It’s pretty easy to use and the graphics are awesome.  However, they are still hard to get ahold of at the moment.  Sigh.  I’ll just keep researching for it.

After the reception, I went over to my sister’s house to finally get my Christmas present.  This was also a bonus because I get to play with my nephews.  I know they are crazy, but they are so damn cute. They are full of life and energy and I do adore them–even if one peed in my fridge.  We were on the trampoline bouncing and running around–it was fun.   Connor is even learning how to ride a bike.  He got his training wheels on today and was slowly learning how to turn.  It was watching that where I was jealous of my sister to have the boys.  But then again, I’m going to Europe this summer.  So the circle of life continues to turn.

I’ve spent the last five years of my life being a “professional.”  I use the word loosely, because well, to be quite frank, I’m not always that professional.  I’m okay with that.  It’s not a rebellious streak in me to not obey the rules. In contrast, I’m very much a rule follower. It’s just I don’t see the necessity for the formality.  Let’s be people and make connections.  My life, both personal and professional, are ruled by my personal connections.  I have reconginzed one of my strengths as a person and leader is my ability to make connections with people across the spectrum.  I want to get to that personal level with many people in my life and strive to get to it.

My attire never dictates that I am not serious about what I do.  I always dress approperate for the situation I am participating.  I never expect anything less from people but their best. I also let them know when I don’t receive it.  However, I am not a jerk about it.  I explain my expectations, what could have been done, and see if we can move forward.  I look at it as a way to grow and reflect, not to bicker of what didn’t get done.  Of course, we can’t ignore the error, we just have to fix it and move on.

I think where people draw their wrong impressions about me is that I like to joke and have fun.   I believe work should be fun… otherwise, why do it?  I try to make everything I do, even the minor tedious tasks, fun.  There are many ways in the world to make the hard stuff enjoyable to do without discounting the task at hand.  I think people who see what I’m doing and trying to discount my methods or effort because it’s not being done in the same approach as has been done in the past.  Well, will all due respect, the work is still be done.  So what’s the problem?

I think the main problem is that people are conditioned to conform to the system and not try explore their own skin.   I have done it quite a bit and I’ve got my hand slapped frequently.  That’s okay for me. I know where my boundaries are and I will continue to try to push those boundaries.  I need to have flexibility to be creative in managing people and ideas.  If the traditional way is efficient and works, why not do it?  However, if it is causing everyone grief for being painful and grossly inefficient, then the method should be reviewed.

I ran into someone who works with my friend who doesn’t know me well.   However, she is a person that is quick to make judgements about people.  Within the first twenty minutes of conversing with her, I knew I was toast.  She thought that I was all flash and no substance.  There was going to be little that I could do to change her impression, so I let it be.  I am also aware that I can come off that way.  I am a very macro-thinker.  I like looking at the big picture.  I am very organized to get tasks done.  But, I am smart enough to surround myself with micro-thinkers to get the job done.  To catch all the details that I am not seeing.  I cherish and value those working relationships even when I get annoyed when they are pestering me.  I know they picking up holes in my plan and they are just trying to fill them before its too late.

So,  in summary, I’m not an idiot that’s trying to ascent to higher ground.  I am quite sharp, but have a different way of approaching management.  I might come across flippant, but in contrast, I have a laser beam focus of where I’m going.  There is much flash in my leadership style, but once that dust has settled, I think most people will see there’s plenty of gunpowder behind that bang.

Today I hung out with my cousin Josh.  His grandpa (on the other side) passed away this week.  He, like me to mine, was very close to him.   I’m glad to know that he got to say goodbye on his terms and was prepared to let him go.  It was sad in the same way because it also rehashed some of my feelings from when my g-pa passed away–unexpectedly.  I wasn’t able to say goodbye like Josh did.  But I still know he knew I loved him and that’s what mattered the most to me in the end.

But watching Josh deal with his loss is so much similar to how I did.  He’s trying to take care of his g-ma and trying to be strong.  I just know though when he is alone, which he hasn’t had a chance yet to be, it will all hit him.  I think he needs a good cry to let it all out.  We ran around town with the family making plans and picking things up for the service.  Even though Jimmie wasn’t my g-pa, it still feels like family. 

The title of this entry comes into play here.  When we driving to order cookies, I noticed this giant slide at the local park.  When we drove by it a second time, I pulled over and told my cousin and his girlfriend we just need to have a slide moment.  We got out of the car climbed up to the top of this massive child’s slide and let it rip.  For being a playground slide, it was pretty darn impressive.  We all got a giggle, got back into car, and continued on our mission.

However, it reminded me that our inner child sometimes needs attention too.  It still feels pain and sadness just like the rest of us.  Sometimes we put it aside to deal with our adult emotions and responsiblities.  Yet, it is in our inner child that our heart and soul reside.  It is what makes us who we are and why we grieve too.  For it our inner child that longs for the times spent with people you love that you were so blessed to have in your life while you were young.  The road trips, holidays, and lessons they taught.  You might have forgetten them, but your heart and inner child won’t let them go.  Sometimes you have to have a little play date with your inner child to have them remember all those great, special times you had with those you love.

So inner child, you got to play today.  I wish you can play more, but the sad reality is that the adult runs my life more than I would like it.  I wish to go back and spend more time building forts, having sleep overs, and just being a kid with you.  But those times are lost, but not gone.  Hopefully when the circle of life, I can bring you out again more and introduce you to my children.  I know you will make great friends.

To those that have passed before us, the human condition allows us to grieve and share the good times you helped provide.  The rituals and flowers will come and go in flash.  When the dust settles, what you provided to this world is what will remain.  The connections you made, lives you touched, the differences you have made–those are what people gathered around food will share.  The life you made for yourself–both the good and the bad–will be celebrated.  And in the afterlife, you might find a child swinging on a swing unable to comprehend all that is going around him or her.  Find them, grab a swing and reconnect.  There is no pain, no suffering, no loss… you and your inner child will be able to be one again and watch the ones you love. 

I’m not liking my new ipod.  I had to get a new ipod because my nano turned into a shuffle.  For those who missed that joke, the screen on my nano went out.  So, I went on Circuit City online and bought myself a spiffy new nano.  I was impressed with the new layout and style.  ipod–you and I are going to make beautiful music together.

 WRONG

First off ipod, you always seems the battery is out.  You are supposed to have a battery life of like 24 hours and it always seems that it’s running out–especially when I going to the gym.  Nothing pisses me off more than having to leave the gym to go home to charge you ipod.  True, I just live across the street.  True, it only takes 10 minutes to charge enough to workout.  But it’s the principle of the matter… you are not supposed to die ipod. 

Another instant when the battery was half full (or half empty you naysayers), you just up and died on me.  Not cool.  I had to finish my work out in silence.  Well not silence, but mubbling and the squeeks of the machines.  It doesn’t top Ok Go rocking out.  What are you doing to me ipod?

So here you go ipod, you and I don’t know each other well.  But rest assured, I have the patience of a hummingbird, you piss me off again and I’ll ship you back to Apple so fast your wheel will do a 720.  That’s right.  You won’t be in my possession any longer.  In a few weeks, you’ll be online at overstock.com being sold as a refurbished hand me down.  You’re only one step away from being found in a bargain bin at your local Cancer Society Thrift Shop.  Will I be sad for you ipod?  Don’t count on it.  Ice water run through these veins as far as you are concerned. 

So the lesson ipod, keep your charge, work when I need you, and don’t make me go deaf.  Oh you didn’t think I didn’t know that little nasty trick you have up your sleeve ipod.  Bah. I knew about it.  You can try all you want, but I can turn you down and lock you down–don’t mess with me ipod. 

 ipod you are on notice… and you have been warned.